What Should You Do with Lingerie from an Ex?
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What Should You Do with Lingerie from an Ex?

Today's guest post comes from Krista, a regular author over at The Lingerie Post. The Lingerie Post is one of the best sources anywhere for finding out the latest lingerie, underwear, and swimwear news. They also have a great lingerie sales page that I check at least once a week.  

If you enjoy this feature by Krista, why not read her other Lingerie Post articles here? And don't forget to tell us what you do with the lingerie an ex gave you in the comments!

My friends have really taken to having a friend in the intimates industry. So naturally when I'm around, conversations about lingerie often come up. I was in a cab en route to a party with some girlfriends when one of them shared the story of wearing one of her most fabulous bra and panty sets for an important date and how it just happened to be a gift from her ex. "Should I feel bad about that?" she asked. This prompted the other friend to talk about a few pieces in her collection that she's had for a while that were purchased during the era of an ex. "It's mine. I don't want to throw it away. But how do you repurpose lingerie?"

Hmmm... that's a good question. Is lingerie like a song? Can you just create new memories with it and let the old ones fade or will you still attach it to that one particular person? If it is attached to one particular person, do you just get rid of it? If you are addicts like us, you probably spent a pretty penny on some of those pieces and "getting rid of it" is just not an option. Unlike a song that you can flip a switch and get rid of, lingerie is a bit more... well, intimate.

I don't have an answer to the question. To each her own. But I'll tell you my opinion based on my own lingerie philosophy. Lingerie is YOURS! Especially if it is something you bought for yourself. At the end of the day, it is about you feeling good, confident, sexy, empowered. If he pays enough attention to enjoy it (without being in too much a rush to rip it off), then that is the bonus. The icing on your already very fabulous cake. So go ahead and repurpose your pieces. Wear for yourself. Wear them for someone else. Just wear them with confidence and you'll hear no judgment from me. 

Other thoughts?

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Cora Harrington

Founder and Editor in Chief of The Lingerie Addict. Author of In Intimate Detail: How to Choose, Wear, and Love Lingerie. I believe lingerie is fashion too, and that everyone who wants it deserves gorgeous lingerie.

11 Comments on this post

  1. Ian says:

    mayhemWhen the ex goes, lose what he bought you, what you bought before ,during and after him , is yours, \.
    The new guy does not want to walk the same path as the ex,let him buy you new and walk a new path, after all it is only cloth and can be replaces and with anew emotional connection and memories,,,

  2. Anonymous says:

    well you should wait for your my boyfriend to sleep and change him in the lingerie as a joke and take
    pics of him lol wouldn't that be fuuny to see,just to see the reaction on their face…………
    dont think they would be laughing

  3. Kathy says:

    I think I've dated unromantic men, as none have been sweet enough to give me lingerie. But, I do understand men well, and I'd say they probably really see your lingerie for a couple seconds, and the remainder of the time they're imagining what you look like without it. So, the lingerie doesn't mean anything to your ex and you should get lots more use out of it! Kathy & Friends Lingerie

  4. Anonymous says:

    I have a lovely nightdress that my ex gave me. I wear it for my new man and he loves it too. It is now giving pleasure to the new man which is a kind of perverse "Ya Boo" to the Ex! Just do what you are comfee with but absolutely don't tell the new guy!

  5. Ever says:

    Definitely agree with the comments about the bed/bedroom! And here's another angle: what about that sexy little black dress (or whichever is your favorite article of clothing) that he loved and always ended up on the floor? Would you get rid of THAT? Don't think so! ;)

  6. mary says:

    I think that's avery tricky and personal question-would you like to be reminded of the stuffs you did with your X wearing it? Do you want to remeber the touch when he maybe helped you taking it off?
    when you really love the pieces, wear them if you feel confortable- me I would leave them at the end of my drawer if I would love them too much to throw them away. Really depends how your previous romance ended I guess.

  7. Anonymous says:

    I'm a college guy and after my longtime girlfriend and I broke up, she left it at my place and didnt want it back. I obviously didnt have any use for it, so I ended up giving it out to other friends who knew the situation (and all laughed cause they didnt think too kindly of my ex). I think a couple of pieces are floating around the local Rocky Horror Picture Show crowd and a couple other female friends have taken some. Short version means that everyone is enjoying it somehow.

  8. frankufotos Lingerie says:

    I had to click on this post right away to see the conclusion – Thank you, Krista, for advocating the right one! — BTW, isn't it amazing how someone who believes as you do is smart/correct? — It's *your* lingerie, it ceased to be anyone else's once you received it, either as a gift or by your own purchase.

    I'll grant you, it may have obviously intimate moments attached to it, but so could a bed. Or bedroom. You wouldn't move, would you? True, more hassle, but I'd think the principle is the same.

    I'll also agree with Lisette's caveat.

    IF, however, you really cannot or refuse to accept this, and cost of expensive lingerie is of little or no importance to you, I'd offer this alternative: Once you're with someone you think will be a long-term partner, destruction of certain pieces while they're being worn can be quite.. stimulating ; )

  9. Lisette says:

    just enjoy it with the new partner ;-)

    that's what I do!

    (and please don't say to him/her that it was a present from your x!)

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