The 7 Deadly Lingerie Sins
The Lingerie Addict has a sermon for you today and we’re talking about the 7 Deadly Sins of Lingerie. Don’t worry about it if you see yourself in one or two of these; I’ve done all of them at one time or another. But if you feel the need to make a confession (or just want moral support), you can always drop me a line at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Drooling over something just because you saw a model wearing it in a magazine ad and then buying that something because your subconscious whispered that it’ll make you look like the model. No, sweetie, it won’t. If you have larger boobs, you’re gonna need a supportive bra… not a bralette.
Buying lingerie in the size you used to be. Here’s the deal — if you lose weight, gain weight, get pregnant, have a baby, stop breastfeeding, or do anything else that changes the way your boobies fit in your bras then you need to have a professional refitting. The same rule applies to panties. Don’t buy knickers in the size you wish you were; buy them in the size you actually are. Your bum (and the rest of your bits) will thank you.
Not taking care of your lingerie. How often have we heard the handwashing rule? The no dryer rule? The no wringing rule? Plain and simple — your lingerie will look better and last longer if you take care of it. That means your knickers should never touch the inside of a machine washer and/or dryer. And if you really want to get hardcore about lingerie care, then invest in quality products like specialty washes and cotton hosiery gloves. I promise you’ll notice the difference.
Being jealous of someone else’s lingerie (this also includes being jealous of their figure). Let me tell you, there is no better time to be a lingerie addict than right now. The 21st century has a bigger variety of sizes, a wider range of colors, and better quality fabrics than any other time in the past 100 years. There is no reason whatsoever to wear lingerie that doesn’t make you look and feel like a goddess.
Buying anything and everything… especially if it’s on sale. All together now: it’s not a deal if you never wear it. I don’t care if you retrieved that bra out of the $5 bin at Ross. If it tears up after two hours and leaves bruises on your ribcage, then you wasted your money. There are plenty of good, inexpensive bras out there that will amortize to pennies per wear if taken care of properly.
Hating on other people’s lingerie. Yes, I know g-strings aren’t your thing. Yes, I know you prefer stockings over pantyhose. But there is no reason to call people who wear those items by bad names or to create entire web forums, discussion boards, and blogs dedicated to badmouthing those people. And for all the folks who think they’re getting away with something because they’re “anonymous”… an anonymous asshole is still an asshole.
Buying lingerie out of your price range, even if you have to use a credit card to get it. My fellow La Perla, Wolford, and Agent Provocateur addicts know what I’m talking about. Yes, I too can be seduced by the beauty of a perfect pair of high waist, Chantilly lace, hand-embroidered panties… but that doesn’t mean they’re worth a month of ramen dinners, much less going into debt over. If the Kiki de Montparnasse keeps calling your name, set up a separate bank account, and then treat yourself after you sock away enough money to pay for it in cash.
How have you sinned lately? Why don’t you share it in the comments?